When you lose someone you love, it’s like a light goes out in your heart. When my daughter Kristi died, I felt that the light in my soul would never shine again. But life goes on, they say, and you have things to do. So you put on your mask and face the world everyday. The mask hides the pain and the grief, on your face, in your heart; and you get through the day. The mask becomes a new part of you and you are prepared to wear it forever.
And then little things happen...
You see a sign, a butterfly or a penny, and you know that she is with you and always will be a part of you.
… and the mask begins to crack.
My grandson Nicholas tells me he sees Aunt Kristi. “She is the brightest star in the sky.” he says. And you know that she gently guides him.
. . . and the mask cracks a little more until a faint light, your light, shines weakly through.
My friend Rayno says Kristi’s smiling face pops into his mind and brightens his day. And you know that she made an impact on people.
. . . and the cracks in the mask grow wider; and the light peeks through, like rays of sun partly hidden behind a cloud.
My beautiful daughter Jenny gives birth to my new granddaughter, and you know that she is sent to you as a gift from God and Kristi to ease your pain.
. . . and the cracks grow even wider as you dare to allow your love and light to shine on this new child.
And so it goes . . . Slowly, little by little, the mask breaks apart and you begin to feel the sun on your face again; the light in your heart shine again. It may take years, but you know that someday, some how, the mask will disintegrate and you will show your face to the world again. It is a different face than before, because you are different, but it will be your face, none-the-less, and not the mask.
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